Wednesday, 23 January 2013

2013 new year resolution.

It is almost the end of January and only now I can come out with a list of my new resolution for year 2013.

Life as a master student is super hectic, and tiring. I've been busy with final exams, paper project, applications here and there. Once or twice I feel like.. hmm never mind. But but the best part of being a student is; final exams are over, and I am now on holiday. Yikes!

No, no I don't have any plans to travel anywhere for this semester holiday since all I wanna do is, to relax my mind, and hibernate, until the beginning of new semester. Well the truth is, one; I still have to finish up my abandoned paperwork and presentation before end of this month, two; I have no money to spend, blame the scholarship, and three; I have to sit for another exam. nangesss. So my holiday is not really a holiday, I guess.

Ok, lets get back to my entry title. New year resolution. Well to be honest, unlike last few years, I don't have anything specific for this year. Weird, huh? Its not that I don't want to achieve anything this year. But my life journey and experiences that I had last year has taught me to become a different person. I don't have the right words to explain, but whatever happened last year has changed the way I think, the way I bring up myself, and I want to keep it that way.

This year, all I want is to live as a better muslimah in all aspects. I want to learn so much about Islam, to indulge myself and keep my heart close to Him. I want to learn to be patient and redha with qada' qadar. I want to learn to be modest and low profile as possible. I want to learn to cover my aurah properly. And most of all, I wish to visit his home one day, InsyaAllah. 

Early this year, I've started a routine that I've left 2 years ago, recite the Al-Quran 2 ainn during Maghrib everyday, and I will continue until khatam before end of August, InsyaAllah. I have an intention to improve Tajwidd and sholat, so I will try to find time for these and make it weekly routine, InsyaAllah. Ustaz Haji Zahid a.k.a abah is ready to teach whenever I say yes :)

Allah s.w.t. said to his angels, whomsoever makes an intention to do a good deed will be rewarded by Me as if they have done the good deed by just keeping the intention to do so, and they will be further rewarded when they take part in the deed. To which the Blessed Angels replied O Allah and for those who intend to do a bad deed what will become of them, to which His Most-Merciful replies, They have not yet committed this sin so I will not punish them until they have.

We have all been in that position in our lives where nothing makes sense and we involve ourselves in worldly things and sins. But we need to get passed this idiocracy and devout ourselves to Allah s.w.t.

“Ya Allah, dengan ilmu-Mu, aku memohon kepada-Mu pilihan terbaik bagiku. Dengan takdir-Mu, aku memohon kepada-Mu kemampuan dan kekuatan. Aku juga memohon anugerah-Mu yang agung. Sesungguhnya Engkau yang Mahakuasa, dan aku tidaklah berdaya. Engkau yang Maha Tahu, sementara aku tidak tahu. Engkau Maha Mengetahui segala yang ghaib. Ya Allah, jika Engkau telah mengetahui bahawa perkara ini baik bagi diriku, agamaku, kehidupanku, dan pada akhir urusan di dunia maupun di akhirat, takdirkanlah perkara ini untukku. Mudahkanlah, kemudian berkatilah diriku dalam perkara ini. Jika Engkau telah mengetahui bahawa perkara ini buruk bagiku, agamaku, kehidupanku, dan pada akhir urusanku di dunia mahupun di akhirat, jauhkanlah perkara ini dariku. Takdirkanlah bagiku sesuatu yang baik, di mana pun berada, kemudian ridlailah diriku”.

May Allah s.w.t. give us all the chance to wash ourselves from our sins and walk on the one true path. Amiin.

Happy new year, and Salaam Maulidul Rasul :)

With love,

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