Friday, 26 October 2012

26.


 'The best way to prepare for life is to begin to live.' - Elbert Hubbard

Today Oct 27, I am officially 26 years old, a full-time student and I am single. 

Couple of weeks ago my bestfriend who just received her Master degree certificate announced that she will end her single life by the end of this year, and yes, she’s getting married at 26. It’s a good news and I am so happy for her. She is someone who has a Master degree certificate, secure a job and soon to be a bride. Perfect.

I laid on my bed that night, alone with my thoughts, ruminating about what is actually going on with me. But I couldn’t find the answer. And today, I turn Twenty Six. 26. And what have I even done?

I know 26 is not old, ok it is. Well, some of you might think it is. Consider myself surrounded by friends younger than me, been called kak Azyan, kak Azyan lately. No, I don’t hate that. In fact, I’m honoured. But that is not my concern. 26 sounds pretty perfect age for me, but in another 2 months, I’ll turn 27. That’s what I’m afraid of. 27, I am still a student, and SINGLE.

When I finished my degree studies at 24, with good result I thought I could get all that I wanted in my life. Either further Masters level overseas, or get a job with an established company, earn lots of money, get married and live perfectly as I’ve planned.

Then I realized I am no different than anyone else. I know nothing about the real challenges ahead of me. All the plans that I have since back then directly thereafter have given way to a messy reality, where life often gets in the way of my meticulous calculations. My study plan was ruined, I got a job, I admired a guy and.. duh, nothing happened.

At 26, I’ve begin to understand, that plans, like rules, are meant to be broken, either spontaneously or unforeseen. But I believe that everything happens for a reason.

Alhamdulillah, today, things got in the right track, for now at least, that I quitted my job, and currently doing Master studies at local university, and InsyaAllah, I will be sent to somewhere far next year. But somehow I wonder if this is the right choice, I wonder if I can do this or not. It is tough in all aspects. ALL.

Especially today, there is something bothers me, which I don’t want this affect and hurt the people I love. But I realized, I should take it as motivation to myself; that I have to do it no matter what, and I will do it well, to make the people I love proud, and to prove that I can stand up despite hatred.

So, all in all, I think twenty-six is an age where you discover who you really are. We know what our passions are, but as we get older we get so caught up in life we forget about it. 

I'm still twenty-six though, thus I'm still in the process of analyzing every aspect of my life and envying the people who have chased their dreams earlier than I am. But hey, that doesn’t mean that we should stop chasing ours. Let’s dream big and live even bigger!

Lastly, being 26 and single, I have to prepare myself to accept the fact that my younger sister might get married before me. Well, I hope the tradition of giving gift to the unmarried older sister is still valid these days. Valid lagi, kannn?


That’s all. Happy 26th birthday to me. 

Oh yeahh ;-)

Still young,

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